His name is Silver.

Day encounters with people are part of a world unseen by many.  Since most people work and the majority of people who don’t work, have kids — lots of people miss out on the world experienced by the rest.  When I take a moment to leave my small world of figuring out my future, I step into a world where I wish I would find myself more often.

I stopped at our favorite Red Box location.  Hesitant to step into the bubble of the older man who was hovering between the box and the new release sign, I tapped him on the shoulder and asked him if he was picking out a movie.  Confused, he excitedly replied, “Oh no sweetie! I don’t rent movies, I buy them!”  I laughed as I thought how expensive his habit could become.  At that moment, we began a 20 minute discourse about movies.  I learned Silver has 10 rubbermaid bins full of dvds at home.  He buys 4-5 dvds a week — but only on “New Release Tuesday.”  He recommended I save my money on Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, but I really should see The Proposal.  As with people in general, I observed some funny quirks of this older man who wishes he had grandchildren.  After all, he always buys the kid movies too…just in case.

But then Silver said something that will stick with me.  I asked him why he buys movies he’s never heard of when he could rent them for much cheaper.  He responds, “Well, I don’t work anymore.  What else am I supposed to do with my time?!”  We both laughed, but I felt a piece of my heart break for him.

According to Silver, he buys 4-5 movies a week at $17 (roughly) a piece.  That is $340 a month.

He grabs my arm and says, “It was a pleasure to meet you Karianne.  I hope to see you around here again sometime.”  And so I began to think about Silver as he rolled his cart out the door and loaded his purchase into his shiny white Escalade.

It was an interesting interaction that probably wouldn’t have happened outside of the working day and yet, it was so challenging.  As I consider the dreams and visions for my life, I am reminded of the huge opportunity before me to live for myself or to pursue others in intentional ways.

I hope I run into Silver at the Red Box again.  If I do, I’ll know it was a God moment — designed for me to leave Silver inspired with a sense of hope.  Who knows, it’s one mile of a million, but if Silver finds more than the latest movie he doesn’t own, the author of my story will smile at the wonder of His people who decide to do something that awakens another.

 

Highs and Lows

It was the end of a really long day.  The array of our various plans had all changed in the moment I received a phone call asking me if we still wanted tickets.  I make a call to my best and exclaimed the surprising news that came four hours in time.  Suddenly, we jumped into an intense mode to speed up two of the three arrangements we originally had in place and still hoped make happen. 

No matter how fast we functioned to accomplish our goals, it was a failed attempt and we found ourselves sitting around, waiting to leave for the big show.

Hours later, after a six-block run through the rain and many uncontrollable yawn sequences, we were back in the car, heading to our final destination.  He looks at me and asks, “What would be one high and one low for you today?”  I respond without hesitation, “My high is finding you tickets and being able to go with you tonight and my low is definitely how exausted and chilly I am after tonight.”

I looked over at him and asked the same question.  He responded with, “My high is being able to go to the show tonight and my low is…” 

I cannot remember what he said his low was.  But then he continued…

“One day, I really hope to be able to say that my high for the day is about the time I spent reading God’s word and praying.”

I’ve thought about that comment for the last four days.  Do I desire the same thing for my life?  How do my actions shape where I place my daily value for something ‘high’ in my life?  What do my actions say about my focus and motivation for living?

May today be one step of many in the direction I want to find myself one day. 

And, a continued dialogue of our daily highs and lows will help shape our perspectives of where we are and where we’re headed.  It could be our daily purposeful tradition we begin.

 

Her name is Linda.

While on our honeymoon in St. Lucia, Jason & I agreed we needed to take some time to step outside the resort and explore a bit of the culture on the island.  On Wednesday, (the only day it rained) we got in a van with another couple and made our way to a fishing town named Castries where the Marketplace was located.  We were so eager to catch a glimpse of what life could be like for the residents of St. Lucia.

We walked up and down rows of vendors.  As in most places, they sell everything.  We decided it would be fun to find a piece of art for our home that would remind us of our trip.  We were drawn to a variety of faceless statues.  Some were wood and others were stone, but they were so unique.  Intentional about using our Dave Ramsey negotiation skills, we gathered information across the building on the cost.

Meanwhile, we walked down an aisle where a woman was singing old church hymns.  We commented on her joy that accompanied her song and started a brief dialogue.  We continued browsing, but realizing we were running out of time, we knew we had to make a decision on which statue to purchase.

We ‘randomly’ walked down the same aisle where we encountered the joyful lady.  As we stood behind her, she started singing a song I haven’t heard since I was 10 years old.

“He touched me.  Oh He touched me.  And oh what joy that floods my soul.  Something happened and now I know, He touched me and made me whole.”

Immediately, the song reminded me of my mom.  This image from 17 years ago entered my mind.  I saw her standing in church, just belting out this song as if every thread of her being believed the words to be so true.

I rested my hand on this lady’s shoulder and I said, “That song reminds me of my mom.  I haven’t heard it in years.  Thank you so much for singing it today.”

She gave me a hug and smiled as she passed along a blessing.

Shortly thereafter, we walked outside to meet the other couple and our driver.  Still somewhat emotional about the moment inside, she walked up to us with a bag in her hand.  She asks, “Is you mother still alive?”  ”Yes,” I respond. “Then I want you to give this to her.” She replied.  ”My name is Linda.  Please pray for me.”

I gave Linda a hug and thanked her for the incredible blessing.  She smiled and walked back inside.

In disbelief at what just happened, tears flooded my eyes.  We could have spent hundreds of dollars on things to remind us and friends of St. Lucia (much like the couple who came with us did), but nothing could have been purchased to mean what the gifted hand carved wooden vase means to me.

There is something so special about gifts.  You can never buy that feeling you get when someone gives you something special to them.

 

just nice.

Some people are just nice.  I’m not talking friends or family, but those stranger to stranger encounters that we all have from time to time.  You know those people who know no strangers? 

I met lots of new people last weekend.  Some are still nameless, while others were very personable.  I suppose we had a few things in common.  I’m a bride (soon-to-be) and they love everything wedding.  Naturally, we go together.

All over town, in random places, people waved, smiled, shouted their congratulations, and even wished me a happy wedding day.  This happened all night long.  In one place, a girl (soon-to-be-bride herself) sat down next to me and started asking all about my wedding plans.  It seemed odd to have someone (a stranger) so interested in my day.  Then, she explains she’s a bride too and shares with me a few exciting details planned for her day and then wishes me the best for the future.  As she went on her way, she left me questioning my own niceness to strangers.

How often do I share in the happiness of a total stranger and add to their excitement of a special time in their lives? 
How often do I express well wishes for the future or empathize along with them?

Like the countless people who were just nice to me, I was reminded me of the natural goodness of people.  It’s there.  Although it’s sometimes buried deeper in some — I learned I should not underestimate the niceness in people.  And maybe I should be more generous in spreading niceness on a daily basis.

It feels good.  To be nice (not to be confused with courteous) with strangers.  Try it.  It made my day.  And sometimes it might be what you need at that very moment.

 

Convenience and a Turkey Sub

An old friend of mine originally submitted this for publication with Relevant Magazine (https://www.relevantmagazine.com/features-reviews/life/2272). 
I came across it today and thought it was a good reminder.  Thanks Ryan for your inspiring thoughts.  I hope you’re still writing.

Convenience and a Turkey Sub
by Ryan Igielski

Job. Not the occupation you either like or dislike. Not the thing you go to certain days between Sunday and Saturday. The person. A man that was put through the ultimate test. Here’s the FoodSaver Plus version: Read Job 1-2. He didn’t worship God out of what he could get out of the relationship with Him. He worshipped Him because he loved the character of God, how God never failed him and how God provided everything for him. So many of us—I’m talking mostly about Americans, because I am one, but this is not limited to only Americans—love all the things God does for us. So much so that it seems to me that we often like those things he does for us more than we love God himself.

** pause for a deep breath **

Please stop, take a deep breath, don’t become defensive, and understand that I’m not saying this for all people, all Americans or for all of us all the time. This MAY be the case for SOME people SOME of the time. There are some times that I’m guilty of this train of thought, so I tend to think there are others who think similarly as well. Now that we’re not reading this defensively, please continue.

** take another deep breath because they just feel good **

We like when God heals, when God intervenes in tough times, and when He provides for us when we never think possible. For example, right now I have a nagging cough. I’ve thought several times, “It sure would be nice if God healed me.” But why? So I could tell of the awesome work God has done in my life and let it be a testimony to His name? Or, so I can be alleviated of the inconvenience this cough has been and tell no one that it was God who healed me? After all, I’ve served God for so long, He owes me.

Let me clear one thing up: God owes us nothing. We owe Him everything. But as humans created with a human nature, sometimes we think God owes us favors for how often we go to church and for reading our Bibles.

On my way to worship team practice one night I wanted to stop at Subway on my way. I had about a 15-minute drive, and I passed one Subway that was about a half mile off the road I was on. Out of my complete laziness, I thought, “There’s got to be one closer than this. I know there’s one downtown that I can go to and that’s right on my way to church.” Five minutes later, I passed another one and it still wasn’t the one downtown yet.

I knew the one downtown was still there too, but this one was only twenty-five feet off the road I was driving on. “Couldn’t get much closer than that,” I thought. So it was there that I got my turkey sub on wheat with mayo and everything but jalapenos and olives on it.

As I was walking out the door, sub in hand, I began to reflect on what had just happened. I wanted to go to the Subway that was most convenient and the least amount out of my way and at that moment I thought to myself, “How often is my relationship with God like that? Is that what I want? Convenience? Blessings?” Yes all of those things are nice, but then this picture of Job flashed across my mind. He wasn’t a guy that served God out of convenience or because of what God could DO for him. He served God because God came first. God wasn’t some addition he added to his busy life that we Americans are so guilty of sometimes. God was Job’s life. He was what he lived for everyday.

At that moment, I came to the realization that I do not want to be someone that serves God out of convenience or because of what God can DO for me—I look for Subways that way. I don’t want to search out the heart of God in the same way I search for a turkey sub.

I want to desire God for who He is, not for what He does.

Yes, He does so much for us, and trust me I’m grateful for that, but may that not be the reason I desire to spend time with Him and chase after the plans He has for me. May I chase after Him because of His character and because He desires to spend time with me. One of the worst gifts anyone can give someone is the gift of convenient time. I’m not talking about fitting people into our schedules—time management is a good thing. I’m referring to the I’ll-hang-out-with-you-because-there’s-something-in-it-for-me mentality.

If friendships are based on that self-serving mentality, they are not going to last very long. People catch on. And if people catch on, the God that knows every intention of our heart catches on as well.

This really hit home in my heart, and in thinking this, it was a bit of a letdown for me because I thought of the many times my relationship with God has taken the passenger seat to something else that really wasn’t more important. The reality is that nothing can be more important.

“God isn’t looking for religious people; He’s looking for people who are hot after His heart. He wants people who want Him, who want the Blesser more than the blessings.” –Tommy Tenney, The God Chasers, p. 149.

May it be my heart’s desire to unlock the heart of Job inside of me and put God first over everything else and, in doing so, “want the Blesser more than the blessings.” And may I chase after God simply for who He is, not what He can do for me.

 

peace.

I opened the cupboard Saturday morning and reached my hand to grab my favorite mug.  Yet, it was missing and a larger, white one was in its place.  I pulled it down and filled it with warm water to take the chill out of the air.  I wrapped my hands around the large white mug and leaned against the counter.  I was alone in the house I grew up in for the first time in years.   As if time stood still, I caught myself thinking about all of the stories these walls could tell, if they could indeed talk.

The weather was typical of this place up north.  Usually chilly and overcast, it was a welcomed break from the sweltering heat of the last week, 150 miles from here.  It’s days like these when staying in is all I need to slow down and enjoy the day without any agenda to accomplish.

As if it was my daily routine, I walked into the sunroom with my coffee mug in hand and stood in front of the windows.  I paused and looked around the yard and then continued through the dining room and into the living room.  I sat down in my favorite chair.  It’s in that chair, I’ve had some of the best conversations of my life.  It’s in that chair, I’ve read some of my favorite books.  Bringing the mug to my face, I looked out the front window.  It was the glass that captured the reflection from my mug.

I rotated the mug in my hand and this is what I read:

“peace. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work.  it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.”  (unknown)

Captivated by such a profound statement on a mug I found in the cupboard, I read it again.  As I sipped from it, I considered the thoughts of the one who regularly enjoys their favorite warm beverage from it.  I wondered if that person was reminded of hope each time they held this mug.

This mug is the newest addition to the cupboard.  It sits among the other pieces of ceramic that were acquired when matching dishes were purchased, gifted, or brought home from a favorite vacation destination.  This mug is unlike the others.  It doesn’t match any set and is the only one of its kind.  But it sits on the third shelf in the very front, on the edge as if it gets used, washed, and put away just about every day. 

The phrase printed in black was a subtle reminder that we can go a long way with encouragement.  That with hope, the never-ending feel of a situation begins to diminish.  That the peace Jesus left was his parting gift to us.  He didn’t leave us the way we’re used to being left — abandoned, but He left us well and whole. (John 14:25).  Over and over the Bible says, “Peace to you.”  Romans 15 says it best as I think about the relevance of the day, “May the God of great hope fill you up with joy, fill you up with peace, so that your believing lives, filled with the life-giving energy of the Holy Spirit, will brim over with hope!”

With one more sip remaining in this mug, I tilt it forward and savor the finality. 

I walk back into the kitchen, slowly wash the mug and dry it off.  Holding the mug as if it were a fragile life, I open the cabinet to return it to its newfound place.  This time, turning it around so the words would inspire the next one who would open the cabinet door.  I turn around and lean against the counter and smile.  Myself, at peace, confident the one who drinks from this mug the most, is a fighter.  There is calm in her heart.

 

Well said…

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

“Now that you have raised your sail, be sure to set sail and stay sailing. Its one thing to leave harbor, but its another to stay sailing, even if theres no wind. But you know what they say, if theres no wind, row. I believe in you. Ill for sure see you when we anchor on shore, until then hopefully our boats will cross paths.”

Thank you.

 

I’ve raised the sail.

A ship is safe in the harbor, but it’s not what they were built for, right?

It’s time to sail.

I’ve been a dreamer for a long time. 

If you’re lucky, you’ve heard my stories of life and hope.

Now, I think I’m ready to do. 

Finally.

I’m going to set sail.

On my own, but not alone.

It’s a beautiful day. 

I cannot waste one more.

I’ve raised the sail.

 

Summer on the Lanai

I recently spent some much needed time in my favorite place in the world.  I travel there often, but not frequently as I would like.  And when I get there, I am reminded that it is always the most refreshing place to visit.  Sometimes I think it’s the constant sunshine that makes me smile, while other times it’s the familiarity of an old place that makes it feel like home. 

And so it’s that time of year again.  Year 7.  This time by myself.  Books full of stories fill the pages and as I pick up one of those books every year, the stories I read this time were bittersweet.

I read a page and my heart sang like it did the summer I spent on the lanai.  It started singing the day we unexpectedly drove past that lanai this April.  Headed for either Chic-fil-a or a Slurpee from 7-Eleven (easily my two southern favorites), I recognized the tune and without hesitation, I joined in the song.

It was on that lanai when I first understood that God wanted me to be something that I’ve never been.  Still underlined in purple, the summer of 2003 defined my life and I’ve never been the same.  I hear the words I read on the page, “Don’t lose heart in the process.”

There are few days when I “get” the last few months.  But the same peace I had that summer, six years ago, is real for me again today.  “Abide in me.  Fret not.  Bank your faith in the character of God. Keep paying the price.” 

So that I may know Him.

It must be why I love to revisit this place that will always be held as markers of spiritual definement in my life.  I know I will always find what I’m looking for because I pursue it with eager anticipation. 

It’s a sacred place where life is refreshed every time.  He never disappoints.

 

May 14, 2009

As I peer out my window blinds on a day when it all began 27  years ago, my heart is lifted.  Today is a great day.

I can hear the birds chirping as a light breeze circulates freshness as I continue to wake up, unsure of what the day will bring.  I read the notes friends have sent, encouraging me in this journey.  And then I wonder, why does my spirit feel downcast within me? 

I’m reminded that my worth is not found in what (professionally) I do, but in who I am.  It’s found in the beauty of the one who has formed me from the beginning.  I will never forget a conversation I had with a friend a few years ago.  Finding myself discontent in my job and talking about my dreams for the future, my friend stopped me in mid thought and said, “Have you ever thought that maybe you’re doing it right now?”  Referring to the dreams I have for my life, I had not paused to consider the influence of my own at that moment.

“Why my soul, are you downcast? Put your hope in God, for I will praise him, my Savior and my God.”
“Why my soul, are you downcast? Put your hope in God, for I will praise him, my Savior and my God.”
“Why my soul, are you downcast? Put your hope in God, for I will praise him, my Savior and my God.”

I begin to meditate over and over on this favorite found in Psalms.

My roommate pops her head in my room and says, “Good morning Sunshine. Happy Birthday.”

I laugh, smiling on the inside.  This day may be for me, but it isn’t about me.  Something great is at work in me.

It is a wonderful life. All 27 years of them.